A friend was blessed with a baby girl a few days ago,his second ,and was quite distressed by sympathy calls.
Its navratra time,and almost every household worships little girls as kanjaks (little devis).
In a casual chat during an odd job,our old electrician tells me that the marriage proposal of his son (class 3 dropout,unemployed)did not materialise.because though the girl was ok (12th pass,working) ,her complexion was wheatish!
A few kms. away the same evening,at a farewell party at a friend's place,much to the amusement of all the guests,his old mother confronts his boss in crackling bhojpuri,about the office policy of not allowing more than two kids.
The much embarrased friend admits that due to her constant nagging about his two daughters and the need to have a son ,he had cooked up the entire office policy story !
I hate to think this is India 2010,where daughters are still considered not good enough to complete a family.A son is still the ticket to salvation and pride,because daughters will go away to another family.
Yes to another good family only if they are fair ,slim,tall and beautiful !
Why ?why?
Will it ever change?
The need is not to worship little girls as devi ,but to give all girls a warm welcome in our lives and society,to treat them with equal love and respect .
Our girls don't need validation of their existence but acceptance of their being.
Well, no pun intended to the seriousness of the matter, but I have another problem. My 2 year son thinks he’s a girl. The other day on a flight the air hostess asked him whether he was a good boy. He replied, “No, I am a good girl.” Phewww! I guess it has to do with my intense desire to have a girl when I was expecting. I was so disappointed to learn that I am going to have a boy that I broke down. He must have picked the distress signal in the womb….ha ha ha
ReplyDeleteComing back to the post, yeah it’s an age old mentality. Some folks out there are still clinging to it, others have moved on. The office policy excuse was a smart one indeed. The electrician’s son doesn’t deserve a better educated gal. He’s such a looser…stinker! I am glad for the girl. And congrats to your friend who’s had a baby girl. She too can express her sympathy to all those who will miss out on raising two angels.
thanks gunjan for sharing your personal anecdote!
ReplyDeleteI feel the onus should be on bringing up children who are sensitive to gender issues irrespective of their own gender.
And the friend with two angels is a successful civil servant ,who just loves both the girls despite all the adverse reactions!
so yeah maybe all hope is not lost!
some changes are happening ,what is bothersome is their pace.at this pace it will take a few more centuries!